Sometimes it is to hard to even care. I'm like a lifeless body trying to find away, but more now these days I fill like I am falling through the cracks, and ya know what I want to, but it just seem not to be happening. There is so much I want to say, and in my mind I have the words to do it, but sadly when it comes to saying it I am lost, and it become very pointless. In a way I fill like I am almost pointless. I wish I could just say things that I will never say. Like; I just want to show you the real me... I just want to love you... The truth is I am scared... I never am who you think I am. The list of things I want to say are just bigger than this, and to be real I have said some of them, just never how I want to. I find I was always trying to say them in a way that would make me feel better about myself, and now its so exhausted that I don't even this they want to hear it no more. So I give up, cause I'm tired... Kind of lonely... And very confused... At least I lasted longer than I though I would. I am a hard worker I think. Sad worker who knew this would happen, a worker who wants to cry. Actually I am crying... Well that's it from ramble of the fucking depressing day. Peace People.